Rogue Washing Machines

We are a young and growing web and mobile application development company specializing in iPhone, mobile, and LAMP development projects.

In a prior life, the development team and management was very nervous about mentioning the dreaded “outsourcing” or “contractor” or “resource augmentation” terms outside of closed door meetings because of the “negative” connotations to the staff and other team members. Really, what does it say about or to a team of developers that they are overworked and the company is not willing to bring on more full time developers to handle the never ending workload.

We developed code words that we could use instead of the O, C, or RA words that would have relevant meaning and still poke fun at the fact that nobody has the cajones to use the actual words in public.

To that end, the following was the nomenclature that was developed:
  • Nobody is allowed to use the Outsource, Consulting, or Resource Augmentation terms in anybody else’s presence.
  • You must use the term Washing Machine instead of Outsourcing, Consulting, or Resource Augmentation to reflect the use of external labor on a project.
  • A project is to be referred to as a ‘load of laundry’ and not as a contract, projects, requirement or statement of work.
  • The size or number of ‘loads of laundry’ is directly proportional to the size or scope of the project, contract, requirement, or statement of work that cannot be mentioned.
  • Words like ‘expense allocation’ or ‘capital project line item’ are now replaced with number or amount of quarters to reflect the monetary cost to process or finish the project.
For example, a project that requires 3 contract resources 20 man days to complete at a cost of $20,000 is actually a Laundromat that has 3 washing machines. In order to do the big load of laundry, it would require 20 days for those 3 washing machines to finish for a cost of 20,000 quarters.

But wait, there's more..........

This same fear of outsourcing can be extended beyond the washing machine. QA would be the dry and fold service. Subject matter experts and high cost specialists would be hand wash or specialty loads. The list goes on.

What can we do for you?

Let us handle your washing machine needs. We can handle your iPhone APP, Web Development, and Facebook development needs. We will sit down and discuss your needs and work with you to design the best solution to meet your business needs. We will then build it for you without making your development or IT staff scared or nervous. We work with you in order to work for you to get you the cleanest bundle of laundry every time.

In a prior life, the development team and management was very nervous about mentioning the dreaded “outsourcing” or “contractor” or “resource augmentation” terms outside of closed door meetings because of the “negative” connotations to the staff and other team members. Really, what does it say about or to a team of developers that they are overworked and the company is not willing to bring on more full time developers to handle the never ending workload.

We developed code words that we could use instead of the O, C, or RA words that would have relevant meaning and still poke fun at the fact that nobody has the cajones to use the actual words in public.

To that end, the following was the nomenclature that was developed:
  • Nobody is allowed to use the Outsource, Consulting, or Resource Augmentation terms in anybody else’s presence.
  • You must use the term Washing Machine instead of Outsourcing, Consulting, or Resource Augmentation to reflect the use of external labor on a project.
  • A project is to be referred to as a ‘load of laundry’ and not as a contract, projects, requirement or statement of work.
  • The size or number of ‘loads of laundry’ is directly proportional to the size or scope of the project, contract, requirement, or statement of work that cannot be mentioned.
  • Words like ‘expense allocation’ or ‘capital project line item’ are now replaced with number or amount of quarters to reflect the monetary cost to process or finish the project.
For example, a project that requires 3 contract resources 20 man days to complete at a cost of $20,000 is actually a Laundromat that has 3 washing machines. In order to do the big load of laundry, it would require 20 days for those 3 washing machines to finish for a cost of 20,000 quarters.

But wait, there's more..........

This same fear of outsourcing can be extended beyond the washing machine. QA would be the dry and fold service. Subject matter experts and high cost specialists would be hand wash or specialty loads. The list goes on.

What can we do for you?

Let us handle your washing machine needs. We can handle your iPhone APP, Web Development, and Facebook development needs. We will sit down and discuss your needs and work with you to design the best solution to meet your business needs. We will then build it for you without making your development or IT staff scared or nervous. We work with you in order to work for you to get you the cleanest bundle of laundry every time.